Me & My DDs: Dogs & Dependants (dogsanddependants) instagram photos and videos

Me & My DDs: Dogs & Dependants
Me & My DDs: Dogs & Dependants

Pooches 🐶 🐶 Smalls 👧🏼 👶 How many hours till bedtime?

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Hey everyone, long time! I thought I would share a very quick and #alternative way to #trim #naturalhair. Some people may say this is completely wrong but I feel it works really well for me especially if time is limited. I am always trying to find quick and easy ways to do things when it comes to my hair. So I #cleansed #deepconditioned #moisturised my hair yesterday evening and styled it in the #chunkytwists you can see I have 18 in total. I used scissors specifically for #cutting #trimming hair. I worked twist by twist pulling slightly at the end to get an idea of where to trim. When trimming I am looking to cut just above the weathered/frayed end. I literally cut half inch to an inch off so if anything goes wrong you wouldn't necessarily be able to tell 😂😂🤣 On a serious note this works for me folks and is worth giving a try. 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙 #naturalalternatives #naturalhaircommunity #londonnaturals #naturalhairsistas # #type4a #type4hair #nofrils

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➡️➡️➡️ The 9th to 15th is Baby Loss Awareness Week and it's expected there will be a debate in parliament shortly around the psychological support available after a pregnancy loss; http://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/2019/10/baby-loss-awareness-week-coming-to-westminster-a-day-early/ #lifewithkids #meandmydds #dogsanddependants #toddlers #toddlersofinstagram #parenting #motherhood #babylossawareness #miscarriage #ectopicpregnancy #blaw2019 Follow us on Facebook and Instagram @dogsanddependants https://www.facebook.com/dogsanddependants/ www.instagram.com/dogsanddependants

On the first day of Baby Loss Awareness Week 2019 I'm reposting this about my rainbow baby. This one is for The MD I’ll try to do you justice, my little rainbow baby. My first baby. My sleep is for the weak baby. My little chatter baby. My never stops talking baby. My please stop now, I didn’t think it was possible for the first year and a half of your life, but now I’m certain if I hear you say ‘muummeeee’ one more time I’m going to ban Hey Duggee and I mean it this time. I obviously don’t mean that. I love Duggee. From the start you were all about Mummy. It took a good year for you to accept that Daddy wasn’t going anywhere and you should probably start acknowledging him. Now you’re all about Daddy. Traitor. And you look like him. Double traitor. I GAVE YOU LIFE. You made me a mother which means a lot when mine is gone. You push me to the line, then you piss on the line, laugh and run away. I wanted you to be a strong willed women capable of forming opinions and sticking up for yourself. I didn’t want you to be a strong willed toddler able to form opinions and stick up for yourself. You are giggly and moody and determined and creative and just about perfect in every way. You love biscuits. You can be the sweetest to your little brother. You can also be a knob. You run around shouting ‘aba caba’ while smacking him over the head with whichever blunt object is your wand that day. ‘Can you stop assulting your brother please?’ ‘No thank you mummy me doing magic’ Well done, you magic’d a few more of his brain cells away. You’re good to your canine henchmen. You throw toys for Spooty Crotch and sneak food for Poo Monster. They’re not immune to your controlling ways but generally stare blankly when you order them about. One day soon they’ll learn I’m sure. Then me and your Dad really are fucked. Don’t grow up. #blaw2019 #babylossawarenessweek #miscarriage #ectopicpregnancy #lifewithkidsanddogs #lifewithkids #meandmydds #dogsanddependants #dogsandkidsofinstagram #toddlers #toddlersofinstagram #betteroutside #parenting #motherhood #btbamamas #optoutside Follow us on Facebook and Instagram @dogsanddependants

He would like one sofa please. @ullswatersteam @ullswatersteamers #lakedistrict #ullswater #vanlife #germanshorthairedpointer #gsp #gspofinstagram #lifewithkidsanddogs #lifewithkids #lifewithdogs #meandmydds #dogsanddependants #dogsandkidsofinstagram #gsplife #toddlers #toddlersofinstagram #betteroutside #parenting #motherhood #btbamamas #optoutside #ukhikers Follow us on Facebook and Instagram @dogsanddependants https://www.facebook.com/dogsanddependants/ www.instagram.com/dogsanddependants

Eight years ago my sister and her then boyfriend offered me the spare room in their holiday apartment. I tagged along with them and a group of friends, how hard could mountain biking be after all? We can blame quite a lot on that holiday. My sister got engaged on a mountain side. Things took a different turn for Mr DD. On his first night he was innocently whistling in an unlocked restaurant toilet cubicle when a woman burst in, clearly and shamelessly trying to steal a glance at his schlong* ( #MeToo). I was that toilet pervert. He managed a day of serious mountain biking before he was the unfortunate victim of an accident that resulted in a dislocated and broken thumb**. Meanwhile I had realised mountain biking was actually quite tricky and decided to retire from the sport before I lost a limb. So Mr DD through injury, and me through general lack of ability, were unable to bike for the rest of the holiday. Instead we drank together, swam in a lake and he even saved my life***. On returning to good old Britain our relationship blossomed. In time I managed to smuggle myself out of Norfolk, we got married and had two children. Then, well, then came the inevitable. The vasectomy. A few months later the good news was delivered, Mr DD has super sperm. At this point he was given an actual doctors note to have as much sex as possible. Birth a person and you may be offered toast. Mess up a vasectomy and you’ll get given a sex pass. Un-fucking-believable. ➡️➡️follow the link in the bio to read on➡️➡️ #lifewithkids #lifewithdogs #meandmydds #dogsanddependants #dogsandkidsofinstagram #gsplife #toddlers #toddlersofinstagram #betteroutside #parenting #motherhood #vasectomy

Nailed it. . . . . . . . . #family #familyphoto #germanshorthairedpointer #gsp #gspofinstagram #lifewithkidsanddogs #lifewithkids #lifewithdogs #meandmydds #dogsanddependants #dogsandkidsofinstagram #gsplife #toddlers #toddlersofinstagram #betteroutside #thule #thulechariot #parenting #motherhood #btbamamas #optoutside #ukhikers #englishheritage Follow us on Facebook and Instagram @dogsanddependants https://www.facebook.com/dogsanddependants/ www.instagram.com/dogsanddependants @pendenniscastle @englishheritage

St Ives @summerislanddisco from @surfhousestives ➡️➡️ . . . . . . . . . #germanshorthairedpointer #gsp #gspofinstagram #lifewithkidsanddogs #lifewithkids #lifewithdogs #meandmydds #dogsanddependants #dogsandkidsofinstagram #gsplife #toddlers #toddlersofinstagram #betteroutside #thule #thulechariot #parenting #motherhood #btbamamas #optoutside #ukhikers Follow us on Facebook and Instagram @dogsanddependants https://www.facebook.com/dogsanddependants/ www.instagram.com/dogsanddependants

Mule in the foreground, lovebirds in the background. Photo credit @lucy__dallas . . . . . #lifewithkidsanddogs #lifewithkids #lifewithdogs #meandmydds #dogsanddependants #dogsandkidsofinstagram #toddlers #toddlersofinstagram #betteroutside #thule #thulechariot #parenting #motherhood #btbamamas #optoutside #ukhikers #lucyandyak #nationaltrust #wentworthcastle #nofilter Follow us on Facebook and Instagram @dogsanddependants https://www.facebook.com/dogsanddependants/ www.instagram.com/dogsanddependants @lucyandyak @thule @philandteds @ntyorkshire @nationaltrust @ntwentworthcastlegardens

For their Dada. My rules may control the fun, but you inject the fun in to this operation. That came naturally to you. You see the bigger picture. You're not offended if Daddy isn't the favourite, instead propping me up when only Mummy will do. You carry them when their legs are tired and swing them when their legs are bored. You carry us all really. You teach them annoying shit I really wish you wouldn't. Like pull my finger, or Mummy's name is Kraken, or shouting that Mummy needs a shower in public, ideally quiet, places. You are their defender and their biggest advocate. You set their standard for men, they will aspire to be or surround themselves with men like you. You are exactly the Dad they need. The dogs tolerate me, they love you. They appointed you pack leader seven years ago and that's where you've stayed. They have yet to learn the MD is really in charge. Keep doing what you do. Happy Father's day x #germanshorthairedpointer #gsp #gspofinstagram #lifewithkidsanddogs #lifewithkids #lifewithdogs #meandmydds #dogsanddependants #dogsandkidsofinstagram #gsplife #toddlers #toddlersofinstagram #betteroutside #parenting #motherhood #optoutside #FathersDay #fatherhood #dadwins #dad #daddy #lakedistrict #helvellyn Follow us on Facebook and Instagram @dogsanddependants https://www.facebook.com/dogsanddependants/ www.instagram.com/dogsanddependants

Mr President ➡️➡️➡️ . . . . . . . . #lifewithkidsanddogs #lifewithkids #lifewithdogs #meandmydds #dogsanddependants #dogsandkidsofinstagram #toddlers #toddlersofinstagram #betteroutside #parenting #motherhood #btbamamas #optoutside #sustainable #noplanetb #plasticfreeparent #clothnappies #clothwipes #johnoliverlastweektonight #worldoceanday Follow us on Facebook and Instagram @dogsanddependants https://www.facebook.com/dogsanddependants/ www.instagram.com/dogsanddependants

**BING BONG** Public announcement I FOUND OUT WHAT TALCUM POWDER IS FOR Apply liberally on hands and feet when leaving the beach and the sand just falls off. It just bloomin' falls off. Just like that. Amazeballs. It's taken me 28 years but it was worth it. Game. Changer. . . . . . . . . . #nofilter #southwold #lifewithkids #lifewithdogs #meandmydds #dogsanddependants #dogsandkidsofinstagram #toddlers #toddlersofinstagram #betteroutside #thule #thulechariot #parenting #motherhood #btbamamas #optoutside #beach #notgoinghome

As Spring creeps up on me I find it all very bittersweet, it's my little girls birthday and the time I became a parent but also the time I lost a Mum and it would have been her birthday. Throw in a barrage of Mother's Day adverts and I'm an emotional wrecking ball a few bad decisions away from being escorted out of Boots for shouting that a 'moisturiser gift pack won't bring her back dammit'. I have my own kids now, with my own homemade cards and my own flowers to thank me for wiping up their arses everyday. Things are looking up. The good outweighs the bad and maybe Spring can be a celebration of life once again. Then you unashamed bringers of doom, I'm talking about you the scientists of time, decide to thieve an hour of precious sleep from me on Mother's Day. STOP PLAYING GOD. Who voted for this anyway? I didn't. Forget Brexit, this needs to be addressed but not by Parliament because I'd like it to get sorted out during my life time. Give the job to a group of parents who have just got their kid down for a nap. Running on adrenaline and borrowed time they can do anything. In fact throw us Brexit as well we'll get that tidied up and all the MP's snacks prepared before 3.30pm. Take that hour and I'm striking, except the kids don't recognise my union. Bloody toddler Tories. #lifewithkidsanddogs #lifewithkids #lifewithdogs #meandmydds #dogsanddependants #dogsandkidsofinstagram #toddlers #toddlersofinstagram #betteroutside #parenting #motherhood #btbamamas #optoutside #nationaltrust #beningbroughhall @nationaltrust #brexit

The MD and the Unidog One day the MD, the Unidog and Mummy took a walk. 'So kiddo, what type of cake would you like for your birthday?' asked Mummy. "Unicorn" said the MD decisively. 'That might be a bit tric-' "UNICORN" Mummy was silent for a moment, internally cursing her choice of words. 'What flavour cake' she thought, 'FLAVOUR'. She gave herself a mental slap and concluded by the laws of probability she's pretty much, totally, guaranteed to ace her next Pinterest project. Unicorn cake, pah, piece of piss. Unidog assessed the situation and took a dump directly in front of someone leaving their house. 'Nailed it' he thought. Luckily since the MD was gifted glitter play dough Unidog only poops glitter. So the stranger and Mummy laughed and laughed and laughed. They walked on. 'What present would you like for your birthday?' said Mummy "Unicorn" replied the MD '...I don't think they're native to this country.' "Uni.Corn" 'Unless you can use your powers of pursuation to convince a rhino and a horse to get it on, that isn't going to happen.' "UNI.CORN" 'Unicorn. Gotcha.' Unidog rolled his eyes. He was, after all, eight years old yesterday and no member of this family asked what he wanted, or even bothered to remember his birthday. 56 in dog years and about time he got some sodding respect. So Unidog pissed on Mummy's leg. While attempting to flee this onslaught Mummy made the inexcusable mistake of straying on to 'the boy's side of the pavement' because sometimes even when someone sets out to fight gender stereotypes they still end up with their toddler dressed as a princess, shouting about unicorns on a gender segregated pavement. After Mummy had assured the MD she wouldn't turn in to a boy for walking on that side, and that it doesn't really matter what's between your legs anyway, they went home. Mummy set to work on her guaranteed-to-suceed Pintrest project. The Pintrest project failed and Mummy drank some more of the Pintrest fail gin. Uni.Fucking.Corn. Thanks as always to @crisppyro for the artwork